REPOST: TURNING POINT

i have reached the end of a travel. i am now lost in a shadow of confusion. as i stop the road bifurcates. which way? i constantly ask myself. trying to draw into conclusion. i am currently in limbo. an arm’s reach to reality and a few steps to freedom. am i to live my life as a patriot or am i to live as a free-spirit? i tell myself that this is it! a decision must be made. one way leads to my reign as the island prince, the other to my pride as a hero and savior. i am now in a state of crucial thinking - every step must be well thought of. i try to crawl time inch by inch knowing that this will, if not just temporarily, extend time. as i whirl in constant thinking, i am aware that once judgement is passed, i must stand assertive and never regret. as i choose which way to turn, i seek serenity and soltitude. now, as time passes, the world is living for me.

REPOST: CHAOS

im struggling and i know it. im in complete chaos and im feeling helpless. im being drenched and im starting to drown. on a sidetrip everything is starting to become dull and errosive. it’s sickening and it’s tiring. it pains me. i am choosing to be passive and apathetic. a change in predicament that most would find sudden. i ought to be. a defensive act maybe but for such worthy cause. self preservation. a dismissal of what seems to be conventional - fuck it. all my thoughts are in constant rage. im on protest. all of me. im on guard for a spark of light amidst this darkness. on guard for a shade of gray. im reaching blindly. im hopeless yet ignited by minute bursts of warmth and indignation. as i drown, i feel stabbed by the piercing cold. i surrender but with a lingering thought. pain is transitory. when i open my eyes i’ll be squinting. rays of light will embrace me. i will rise and again - im reborn a victor.

REPOST: REALITY CHECK

no matter how hard we try or make ourselves believe, we sure can’t control everything…..

lesson:

have courage to change what we can and just have the wisdom to accept what we can’t. it fucking sucks but learn to just love it.

just thought i’d share.

REPOST: LIFE BECOMES DEATH

life ceases unpredictably… spend each day as if it was your last for you’ll never know when it will end. enjoy each moment and dont bother seeding grudges - it’s pointless and a waste of time. ranting and squirming only end to a more chaotic disposition.

we’ll miss you tita kris…

REPOST: FUCK MAN, IM CHEESY

no matter how much i try to deny it, im still a sucker for romance flicks! bugger! it kills me just thinkin’ about it… to overcome denial is to welcome acceptance! fine, all guards down. i always thought of myself as the easy-go-lucky type… just chillin around with no worries and hook-ups but you know what, reality check, i do want some complicated love story of my own (fuck man, "love" story?!?) i’ve done some silly shit with my previous hook-ups and im telling you it was damn hell shitty. lol. never the serious type. bloody. i guess i also do want to feel the elated high feeling of "come take me away to where the clouds are" crap…you know, just being irrationally emotional.. the feeling like when your heart governs thinking… the type when your heart races and you go start your day with a smile, whistling all care free while going to where you’re going kinda stuff. cheesy i know, right? i guess im a hopeless romantc after all?!??!

p.s.

right on aisa, right on…. i’ve been hitting your head every time we talk about this.. guess you’d be hittin my head now… or maybe let’s just fly away together… guess you were freakin’ right after all… *winks*

REPOST: EHEADS NOSTALGIA

i miss the eheads… after almost 7 years, i just realized i like their music…

"maselang bahaghari, sa aking isipan

wag kang mabahala, di kita malilimutan

paglipas ng ulan, mapapangiti ang araw

wag sanang mawala ang maselang bahaghari"

- eraserheads

REPOST: BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU WISH FOR

hahaha… okay. so there i was, struggling to seek something thrilling to happen with my life and *alas* - something sure did. this is what happens when your life becomes so freakin dull. you tend to gobble on anything *new* that comes along. lol. bad or good? i dunno… i tend to be ambivalent on the matter (or am i just in denial for i know deep down in my subconcious im enjoying it). hahahah. am i being irrational? honestly, i dont think so! im just braving new things. and i quote "everybody does it, its just that nobody talks about it!" rest assured, i know my limitations. life is a slate. you must keep scribbling on it so you make a good story. like i said, life is a lesson. experiences enrich you and make you wiser. so go experience things. *wink*

p.s.

med students, you rock! (although i never expected the *thing* from you guys!) *winks again*