ENOUGH

i've been in hiatus for the past few days (im sick as hell). in doing so, i was made to ponder about things in life. as i was staring blankly at the ceiling, it made me think how much longer can i actually go on with being unemployed and solely depending on my savings.

reality wise, my savings is drastically depleting and i don't think it can suffice my over extragavant spending habits anymore. i will admit, i am a huge spender. i've always denied this fact to my mom and friends everytime they would tell me that i spend a lot. sometimes, i would get into arguments with my mom because she wouldn't agree on my spending habits. the funny thing is, i only realized this when i think it's a bit too late. as the saying goes, you will only see the worth of something once it's gone. you sure do. in my case - savings.

as much as i'd want to stop being impulsive, i just cant. i always tend to rationalize. it sucks. i've bought so many things that are now just covered with dust. i have clothes that i never got to use, shoes that ive used once, hats that were bought for the sake of just buying them, gadgets that make me think now why i even bothered buying them in the first place, and so much more. the thing with me is, if i see something i like or i think i need, i buy it. im getting sick of this habit. my friends even have this habit of setting a timeline for every new thing i acquire - whether it be a guitar, a keyboard, a skateboard,, a new cellphone, a psp, a camera, etc. they would usually give it two weeks before i get tired of it. most of the time, they are right.

so that you have an idea on how much i actually spend, my usual monthly credit card bill is around 15k  -  to 20k and my cash spending varies from 15k to as much as 50k a month. for someone unemployed, this is not tolerable.

i badly need intervention!!!!!!! is there a rehab center for overspending?!?!?

(come to think of it, this habit will soon be over since there is nothing to spend anymore. i shall glady embrace poverty with open arms! =/)